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March 23, 2006

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» I Don't Get It from Half the Sins of Mankind
The second one, on which her commentators focused, is titled "False Advertising," an ironically appropriate title because those who chose to criticize it seized upon that line in the post, ignoring its real point. [Read More]

Comments

Dee Love

I've been keeping up on the MIMness for a bit now, as I have an intense curiosity around Chicklit and the culture it has spawned. Especially the uptight-manhattenite-jewess-with-familial-money-and-too-much-time-on-her-hands-so-she-decides-to-write-a-book genre, and the housewives that embrace it.

It's funny that in the day and age of this kind of obnoxious chicklit and personal memoir writing that follows "oh dear, i left my prada clutch in the cab and now I can't pay for the gourmet takeout I ordered for dinner tonight because i never bothered learning how to cook and yet i still adhere to those bizarre notions of the 50s Good Housekeeping wife, reveling in the 19th century I must wear my husband's wealth ideology, and yet longing for a ripped 25 year old pool boy to fuck me while my husband is busy being a corporate litigator" that no one has remotely ever mentioned that it was Dorothy Parker that started this whole shebang. Maybe she's just too damn literary? Which really, says a lot.

I'm pretty sure that MIM is as superficial in her real life. Most people are pretty much a reflection of their blog, and honestly, I've read her shit, she's not good enough of a writer to have crafted that tight of a persona. Nope. She's a twit. And the people that love her are the Carrie White's that adore her.

Wait till they make a movie about her life. Oh wait, there are already 20 in the works. Shit.

L.

Howdy there. You don`t know me, I don`t know you. I am "L.," whose husband didn`t bring me to his office Christmas party. I am utterly fascinated to see how far and wide my little snippet of a post has traveled.

For the record, my husband is Japanese, and wives usually aren`t invited to Japanese office parties. I didn`t include much background in my post, because regular readers of my blog know this, and know my family. I can understand why the thousands of strangers reading that one post are now heaping scorn on my husband, and I agree that based only on what I wrote there, he deserves it. In retrospect, though, I wish I had provided more context.
I invite you to read my two follow-up posts on the weight issue. Or, if you`re not interested, by all means -- don`t.

L.

(P.S. Can you really call me MIM`s "acolyte" when I openly disagreed with her in the comments of her "False Advertising" post?)

Helen

For the record, my husband is Japanese, and wives usually aren`t invited to Japanese office parties. I didn`t include much background in my post, because regular readers of my blog know this, and know my family. I can understand why the thousands of strangers reading that one post are now heaping scorn on my husband, and I agree that based only on what I wrote there, he deserves it. In retrospect, though, I wish I had provided more context.

So, although you presumably bend over backwards to assimilate with his culture, he will not go the other way to learn some things from yours? Like treating you as more of an equal?

(Notice I used the qualifier "more of". I'm not under the delusion that Western society is a nirvana of marital equality. But most western men don't hide their wives when they gain weight.

Also, if he didn't take you to the office party because wives aren't invited, why did you make it look as if he did so because of your weight? That was the definite impression I and others got from it.

L.

Helen, whatever gave you the idea I "bend over backwards to assimilate with his culture?" If I did, would I expect to go to a party to which I wasn`t invited?


L.

Helen, this was on top of the post following what was apparently the only one you read:

UPDATE: Last night, after like the 500th hit on yesterday`s post, I asked Hub, point blank, "Did you not want me at your office Christmas party because of the way I look?" and he looked up wearily and said, "No -- it`s because when you drink, you have a big mouth!" And then he said, "Um, why are you asking me this now?" Oh, no reason --- there`s just a bunch of people on the Internet now who hate you because of something your big-mouthed wife said about you on her blog...

Gena

(P.S. Can you really call me MIM`s "acolyte" when I openly disagreed with her in the comments of her "False Advertising" post?)

I apologize, that was blatant jumping to conclusions on my part. I do appreciate you directing me to the other posts in which you shed more light on your relationship, and I will definitely read them. For the record, I found your single post to be far more compelling reading, not to mention your responses, both here and at Pandagon have shown a remarkable level of thoughtfulness and maturity, especially considering how quite a few people (myself included) have inadvertently lifted you up as some sort of poster child for why MIM's post is so aggravating. I look forward to reading more of your blog.

MIM

Jesus. You can't even get the easy facts right. I don't live in San Francisco.

And don't even pretend to think you know me for a minute. How fucking abursd to think you KNOW who someone is based on a blog. People are far more complex than that.

Gena

And don't even pretend to think you know me for a minute.

When did I see that I knew you? Yesterday was the very first time I've ever read your blog. And you're right, you can only ascertain so much about someone from reading their blog. I ascertained that you're shallow and superficial. Am I wrong? Could be. I'm sure you've made plenty of assumptions about me, such as thinking that because I wrote this I'm really angry at myself. Are you wrong? Could be. Who's to say who's right? That's what makes the internet such a delight.

Apologies, I misread where you said you grew up in San Francisco as you currently live there. I'll correct them post-haste.

Gena

Wow, shame on me for those typos there. I've been at work for almost ten hours straight.

L.

All superficial people think a great deal about appearances, but not all people who think a great deal about appearances are superficial. I don`t always agree with MIM, but she is very honest in describing her own situation and feelings, which is why I read her blog.

I`m actually the one who lives in San Francisco. But my kids aren`t babies, I stay far away from the cable cars (and the GG bridge, if I can help it), and I`m actually a refugee from the MSM, not an aspirant.

chris

Please, for the love of all that is good in the world, ignore this MIM person. Maybe she'll go away.

You're pretty funny, by the way.

inkstains

Absolutely intoxicating. Thank you.

There are more responses at our blog collective.

Barbiturate Cat

Wow...that's just...that's just fucking sad.

Her first post speaks like someone who's never had to deal first hand with a mental illness like depression. When my husband was depressed, he didn't gain weight and I sure as hell didn't think "Gee honey, I'm just not attracted to you because you're all mopey, tee-hee! Why don't ya buck up, soldier, and get back that self-esteem?" And I know damn well when I was depressed [both of us suffer from anxiety disorders/chemical imbalances], his main concern wasn't my weight or appearance. What kind of marriages are these people in, where their first concern is about the weight gain? Do they not even stop to care that if their spouse IS depressed, that maybe they...I don't know, need HELP? Support? Love and understanding? God no, I guess that's stupid of me to think that. The best way to deal with a depressed person is to tell them they're gaining weight.

I feel sorry for these women, who think depression is about "self esteem", or whatever sorry bullshit they were spouting. But hey, I guess it's really hard to be depressed when all you think about is Prada handbags or what deliciously self-serving and air-headed blog posts they will write next.

littlem

"Ooooo - sha - sha ...."

You do realize, of course, that the searing sarcasm you exhibit is at least as felonious in a female as "Hollywood fat" in patriarchal eyes.

OT, hinted at but seemingly not parsed (I'm not even going to get into the book deal thing b/c you just slayed with every sly suggestion), is the issue of WHY these posts/comments appear to have plucked several nerves - classism and terminology issues ("advertising", anyone?) aside, even.

I'm just going to suggest that everyone (who hasn't) just THINK about it.

Led here by the Pandagon crew (& Twisty). I am oozing syntax envy and demand to be put on your mailing list should you consider word-sculpting for clients.

margalit

I've been reading Mim for quite some time now, and although I completely disagree with her false advertising post and think she's portrayed herself as a shallow twit, she occasionally, and by that I mean maybe 1:10 posts, has something of value to say. But the problem with Mim is, she's part of this little circle of cool hip left coast mommy bloggers and no matter what one of them says or does, they all jump to the rescue and circle the wagons around their blogging bitch. It's so sad. I don't think one of these bloggers has a clue what it means to think for themselves, so when Mim posts something so provocative and SHALLOW and pathetic, they're all gonna nod "yup, Mim, you got it right" because they're just as shallow and pathetic. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You know she's carrying her cute little handbag and wearing fancy shoes and driving her passat around LA with the best car seat and the coolest stroller and the most adorable baby clothes because after all, appearance is what matters most to her. She lives in LA. What can you expect?

Gena

But the problem with Mim is, she's part of this little circle of cool hip left coast mommy bloggers and no matter what one of them says or does, they all jump to the rescue and circle the wagons around their blogging bitch.

Yeah, that's why it reminds me a lot of high school. If you disagree with something the princess says, it's really just because you're jealous. I'll agree that the cracks a few folks made about her hair and the picture on her blog were definitely childish and uncalled for, but I don't buy that saying her post smacked of superiority and showed a stunning lack of knowledge and insight when it comes to depression is really just misdirected anger and jealousy over her perfect life.

aldahlia

Oh, no. She actually hit "you guys are just jealous" mode?

littlem

Yah. Officially high school. There's some pack behavior survivalist analysis in there somewhere.

flawedplan

I appreciate your analysis.
I flipped my wig reading her post, feeling that MIM was expressing passive-aggressive misogyny, a judgment that had me wondering if I was being unfair to the princess or triggered by my own unexamined bullshit...I did interpret covert hostility in her post, this is something I don't understand, but it does need to be seen for what it is.

Karibelle

Heaven forbid people should be judged by the words they write in their blogs. Perhaps we should all judge people by the width of their asses like MIM does.

Ya gotta love it when someone fires up a shit-storm and then shuts down the comments on her blog because she does not want to deal with other peoples' shit. Classic.

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